The Machine Room - Love from a Distance EP

by Al Brown Rating:2 Release Date:2012-03-05

Edinburgh five-piece The Machine Room are the latest in that torpid trickle of 80s-inspired bombast merchants who never seem to get the message and just fucking die out please, yesterday, if possible. Let's have an inventory check here: cowbells; synths; that one drum machine-aping rhythm that all these fucking bands do to death; and a vague, portentous sense of nothing-in-particular. Check, check, double-check. You want trite-as-fuck lyrics? "I'm gazing through another shop window/ For something that looks nice to make me feel less low," mewls singer John, a little lamb lost in a cheap, polystyrene approximation of a gothic landscape.

It's 2012 now, and we've all had a good laugh at The Bravery; White Lies have been left in a corner to die quietly; even The Drums have been told to step up their game or kindly fuck off. What in the name of Gahan are these dweebs still doing here? Honestly, Scotland, you used to be cool. And now it's all disgusting beardy-emo or dour folkies, or, well, this. I'm starting to think that divorce you keep banging on about is a good idea.

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